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About Perth

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Now, about the river, mate – the Logan River, flanking the edge of the suburb. Its waters just babbling away, almost like nature's own ASMR. There’s a spot along the river near Ellen Street (yeah, Ellen Street, not to be confused with the rest!) where I sometimes end up, just soaking in the moment. Nothing fancy, but it’s perfect if ya need a breather. Look, I'm just saying, nature's the ultimate therapist – and this river? It don’t lie!

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